For the one I hide but is never hidden.
For all that I have loved and all that I have written, there is only one of you, the one I hide but is never hidden. The one I hope to die with. Therefore, this is a demonstration as well as a declaration.
In my last piece, the pinnacle of my effort to consolidate my writing, I thought a bit was misplaced and deserved its article to function as a prologue to my next writing endeavor, a poetry book. I’m going to call it Love, Life & Leadership.
Why a poetry book? I love writing. It is my favorite form of art and, as such, is my most authentic form of self-expression. When I write, it feels like I have a soul, and at times these words pour out of me and into my notebooks. However, if you love something, you should learn how to let it go, and don’t be afraid to show it to the world as it may end up eating you from the inside out.
I fear publicly showing this side of me because I am most vulnerable, and I usually embed my thoughts on love with reflections on life when I write. Parts of this article have existed in my previous writing, but I’ve consolidated it here instead, as they deserve their own space, not a place next to everything else, and not an ending. It has always felt like a continuous flow of new beginnings whenever we’ve met.
Some people come into your life to teach you a valuable lesson; some people in your life are not replaceable. The people that you remember the first time you met, the last time you met, and the time in between. These people, just being part of your life, teaches you the precious lesson that you cannot replace some people. You are the person to teach me this while teaching me how to be me.
For the love of all things beautiful in this world, be you. Don’t apologies, don’t hide, don’t water it down, shine like you’re supposed to. — Yours truly
I’d rather deal with the social pain of the time in between than the social pain of never again. However, there is a fine line between devotion and delusion. Love can break more than your heart. It can shatter your mind. A man does not suffer like this for his own glory.
Nonetheless, you sometimes remember all that suffering is just all in your head, so why put up with it? You try to run and hide, but it always feels like running from the one part that is you when the rest of you is pretending to be something you’re not. So, in the end, I just stopped running and stopped fighting to learn how to live with it and use all that delusion and devotion to create something beautiful in this world. That is why I write and hope to share some of it with the world.
You don’t set out to build a wall. You don’t say “I’m going to build the biggest, baddest, greatest wall that’s ever been built”. You don’t start there. You say, “I’m going to lay this brick as perfectly as a brick can be laid.” You do that every single day. And soon you have a wall. — Will Smith.
“For the one I hide but is never hidden — The one I hope to die with,” I say that because we never hid from the world, even if there are days we wish we could, or I at least do. Furthermore, when faced with death, our wealth, body, status, achievements won’t matter. Only the person you are in the eyes of others is what does, and we live in the memories others have of us. The one you can call a companion to your soul, not just a companion in life, holds a view of you that excepts every part of you; The good, the bad, and the ugly, without any judgments because you’re the opposite, but still the same.
You gave me the courage to start writing again and publicly. For that, I’m forever grateful, and I gave you my writing in return, some of it to the world too. You can complete my story as you hold the letters and the stories that are the other half of everything, but I know now I’m enough even if I’m never complete, and I hope you know you are enough, just as you have always been.
I know who I am when I am still because, in my stillness, I still find you — However, I didn’t lay one perfectly laid brick at a time to build a wall. I made this cathedral, which is all of my writing, so you always know where I stand. Nonetheless, I also know that if an immovable object ever meets an unstoppable force, we’re going to Supercollide.
I’ll see you on the other side of the tunnel, even if I know it’s simply the beginning of the next one, that’s, I guess the thrill of it now and feels like a continuous flow of new beginnings. For years, it’s felt like the thing worth looking forward to, and I’m desperately trying to escape that feeling. Because at first, you fear those who love you never stop loving you, then you start fearing you never stop loving them. Regardless, here are some poems to be featured inspired by you for the time in between, even if that in-between lasts an eternity.
The most extraordinary things I’ve achieved;
-Healthy children who give me the reason to believe…
-Staying true to yourself is worth fighting for, despite the fear…
-Of loving you at the cost of not being able to keep you near…
Pain Paints Paintings
Love Loses Lovers
Hate Hardens Hearts
Happiness Hugs Huggers
Sadness Saves Saviours
Fear Freezes the Free
Emotions lead to actions that affect or create something real. That’s what makes life beautiful, even if it sometimes can feel surreal.
Sea, wave, land
Dessert, heat, sand
Field, wind, grass
Pit, gravel, gas
Mountain, snow, slope
You, me, hope
Compare yourself to others, and I often notice you chasing a forever-moving goal.
That’s good until you can’t run anymore.
Maybe then you’ll understand that you could already find all the things you were chasing in your soul.
Fate is a magician and time I the trick,
try to trick fate and you’ll never make it stick
Fate players poker and only wins by bluffing,
try to bluff fate and find yourself suffering
Fate is a spider and time is the web,
try to kill the spider and get caught instead
Playing with faith is what I learned not to do, I gambled once and I lost you.
I will be gone for a while
I write to bring about a feeling or a smile
In me, in you, in whoever is trying to find some peace of mind.
My virtue is honesty.
It will forever torment me.
Sometimes I overstep on what I should be sharing openly.
I’ll return to my notebook, the place on which I rest my soul
Maybe I’ll share with you again before I’m grey and old
Know that for all that I have loved and all that I have written
There is still the only one you, the one I hide, but is never hidden
My hand still burns from holding yours.
That’s why I can’t keep anyone else close, I know I’ve tried, given it everything, but the feeling still endures.
This is a declaration of love and a demonstration of skill. Feel free to steal because that’s what great artists do as they understand the value of what they see.